Day 207: Unum, I'd like you to meet my mom

Celebrating 86 years of an extraordinary life, filled with love, family, and a passion for rescuing animals, gardening, and bookkeeping. Her radiant spirit and dedication continue to inspire all who meet her.

I knew I’d lose it.

I knew my mom wouldn’t.

When my daughter was born in 1991, I ordered two copies of her birth certificate.

One for me. One for my mom.

Not because I was being thoughtful… but because I was being realistic.

I knew I’d lose mine. And I knew my mom would file hers away perfectly and never misplace it.

Thirty-four years later? I was right. I lost mine before my daughter started school.

Mom still has hers. Exactly where it should be.

That’s who my mom is. Meticulous. Organized. Responsible.

And now, at 86, with vascular dementia, she’s receiving repeated requests from an insurance company implying that something is missing… that something hasn’t been done… that something is wrong.

She doesn’t experience those requests as “process.” She experiences them as failure.

That’s the part people don’t talk about. The human cost.

When systems are designed without empathy, they don’t just delay outcomes…they create confusion, stress, and self-doubt in people who have done everything right their entire lives. In this case #unum is literally impacting my mother's well being by taking away one of the few options I have for keeping her healthy--reduce stress.

It’s now been over 207 days waiting for #unum to process medical records submitted September 7

I’ve filed a complaint with the Washington State Office of the Insurance Commissioner. They responded in 4 days. And have given #unum 15 days to respond.

Same information. Same requests. Same impact.

If your 86-year-old parent received these letters…would they know what to do?

Or would they feel like they were doing something wrong?

I’ll keep pushing. For my mom. And for the families who don’t have someone to step in.

👉 I shared more about the human side of this experience here: Caregiver's Compass

AI assists me in editing my work, but the ideas and words are my own. The conciseness and absence of profanity are all due to AI.